Twilight Review

So, I saw Twilight today. And it was hot. If I smoked, I would definitely need a cigarette after watching that movie. Or a boyfriend. Anyways, this was on my favorite website, gofugyourself, and I thought I would share it with the world.



ROBERT PATTINSON: Hello, my angel. [Snicker] I see you managed to get here without breaking any bones. [Chuckle]

KRISTEN STEWART: You know, we wrapped the movie a long time ago. You can break character and stop with the condescending laughter.

ROBERT: No, I can't. It's the hair. The unruly, slightly oily Edward hair that's damp with the sweat of restraint and clammy lust. They won't let me cut it, and it OWNS me. Is your dress made of sweatshirts?

KRISTEN: They haven't said you can't SHOWER, though. Maybe you're just clammy because all your clothes look a tiny bit tight. And I think your shoe is untied. And, you know, the whole "you need to shower" thing.

ROBERT: God, your blood smells magical. Like sparkles and sunshine and fine wine. I must watch you sleep.

KRISTEN: Do you people see what I have had to put up with? Do you?

ROBERT: Oh, Bella. I love you. I may kill you. You don't know.

KRISTEN: Not Bella. Kristen. Cameras are not rolling. Lord. I give you two months, tops, before all this breaks you.

ROBERT: You intoxicate me. I AM DANGER. Why do you not fear me, human?

KRISTEN: Oh, I fear you, all right. Trust.

I'm the crypt keeper!

So in honor of it being Veteran's Day last week, I was pondering on my old-ness. Seriously, this last birthday has drop-kicked me into the age of "late 20's" for sure. Things that have made me realize my extreme age :

1. I have plantar fasciitis. What does that mean? I can no longer wear crappy shoes and stand all day at work. I have to wear INSERTS! I am old.
2. The music at Abercrombie is officially too loud.
3. When Julia, Annie, and I have What I Like About You tv marathon watching on Tuesdays, I find myself attracted to the older sister's boyfriend, not Amanda Bynes's boyfriend. I think he's a little pip squeak.
4. I had to start putting on moisturizer on my face at night. The teen acne greasiness has finally ran out.
5. I go to the post office at least once a week to mail things.
6. I love spending money on flowers to plant in the yard. And I like planting them.
7. You know this already - we have 10,000,000 cats at our house. Just call me the crazy cat woman.
8. I feel perv guilty for thinking Zac Efron is hot.
9. I eat Raisin Bran every morning for breakfast. Because I like it better than Lucky Charms. Who am I?
10. I can no longer pound a s'more, large hot chocolate, donut etc without getting a huge sugar headache.
11. For my last birthday, I got a membership to AARP in the mail. Not kidding. I can show you my membership card.
12. I feel like I am slipping on my high tech computer-ness and am going to soon take 20 minutes to send an email like my mom used to do.

Just get me ready for the early bird special at Denny's. Kill me.

Book Report

Okay, book report time. First, The Kitchen Boy. Secret Shame: I think that the movie Anastasia really happened. I am kind of obsessed with the Romanovs and their story and I totally think some of them survived and went into hiding. If you agree, read this. It is amazing.
This was the last book in a series. Julia told me it was amazing, I thought it would be better. However, whenever I read these kinds of books it makes me want to move to London really bad. I know a lady that moved over there and worked and ended up marrying someone from there. Imagine being married to Harry Potter! But I would not talk to my children ever so they could have their dad's accent.
Okay I'm not done with this one, I only have 100 pages left. But it has been dang amazing. It's about a lady in the 50's who submits entries to tons and tons of contests and helps support her family that way. It is dang amazing.

The end.

Congrats Bubs!!!!

So Julia found out today that she made it to the state competition for her swim relay for MHS. Yay Bubs!!!!!!However, this does destroy her plans for her start of "no shave November." For the love.

Fair-tastic!

So our dad was out of town last weekend. And we decided to go to the fair without him and eat the world/have a marvelous time.

Of course this sign was right outside the fair. We're in classy land, people.

Julia and the Fletchers begging to ride the elephant. What, like I'm/Reid is made of money? For the love!
Jesus's cow.

Julia and Annie acting like rabbits while we were looking at them. NO we didn't buy one, but we did think about a goat..

The Jones family eating their weight in grease. Food consumed: corn dogs, funnel cake, curly fries, onion rings, ice cream, cotton candy, popcorn, snowies, caramel apples. We might have hit McDonalds on the way home. I know, we're amazing.

The beginning: Corn dogs, french fries, onion rings.
Fletchers + funnel cake=true love/sugar all over their clothes.

Julia being a creep hand model with our half demolished funnel cake.

The empty knock-off dippin' dots. Real dippin' dots are way better fyi.
Delia with straight hair. I know, weird! She may be feeling self conscious about all we ate, she wouldn't even look at the camera...

Loving cotton candy! Eden may have eaten the whole bag. Melissa, we may need to come and see you..

Loving the figure 8 racing. Actually, hardly anyone crashed, so the food was the highlight..

We need a new camera.

Fair love.

Piecey/greasy bangs + snowie love
The best picture of all: Julia being terrified of the giant snakes we paid $1 to see. She should be in their commercial for the booth. Seriously. We may have to put this in her wedding video..

Working It

So Laura and I signed up to work the polls on Super Tuesday. And we will make it rigged so we can work at the same place. We must. I hope they were talking about working this..

Or this. I've always wanted to cut hair.

Depressed.

So, every morning when I take Julia to A-hour, we have bonding sister time. And how do we bond? By listening to our morning news. The Good, the Bad, and the Gossip on 104.7 or "the news you really care about." This morning when I was listening to it alone, Carrie, the discusser of GBG may be moving to a different radio station! NO!!! YOU CAN'T LEAVE US! WHAT EVER SHALL WE DO??!? (yes, this is how obsessed we are with pop culture. I know, awesome.)

I know, I know. The moment you've all been waiting for. The unveiling of the Jones Halloween decorations for the year. As anticipated as Martha's October magazine.. However, I feel that Martha should have an AZ style magazine. Let's be real, this could never happen here.

The pumpkins would burn up in like .2 seconds because those rocks would be on fire. And who has leaves like that? Martha, please have some photos with creepy cactus or spooky bouganvilla or something. It's killing us here.

Here's what we've done so far this year. Some of it is under construction/I need to wait for my paycheck..

The family room. Yes we repainted, thanks for asking. And no the color is not AZ adobe.


I know. I'm very spooky.

The new and improved "handy" wreath.

And the best item..my advent Halloween calendar, made by my friend Tammy. To quote Annie, "She is the bomb." I know, it's amazing.

More pop culture postings.

So Laura and I ditched the world to go see Eagle Eye tonight. Conversation in the car on the way home:
E: Seriously, Oscar the freaking Grouch could wear one of those wool winter coats and I would think he was hot. I love them.
L: Whatever. The plotline for that movie was SO DUMB. The fact that ********* was the *** *** was so, so stupid. I can think of a million other movies where that is the plotline.
E: Like what other movies?
L: Remember when Tartraz (yes that is what we refer to her as) did this post on Shia and I wanted to lick the screen? That was amazing. I need to go look at that post again when I get home.
E: Ooooh, me too. How did the girl in that movie always have really red lips?
And it goes on...


Yeah, we get distracted kind of easily.

Confession time..

So for those of you who know me well, you know that I am very critical of all things movies/tv/books. Most of the movies I see in the theater I think are stupid, yet I continue to go and see them. 8/10 times I hate the movie. But I am a sucker for punishment..

I finally decided to watch the Grey's new episode while cleaning my room/hanging up clothes/doing a million things because it had been determined that it was a crappy episode. Some people I talked to even wrote off Grey's and said they would not watch it anymore because that episode was so stupid...Cristina getting impaled by an icicle.....snowing in Seattle.....it goes on. And I am ashamed to say that... I thought the episode was pretty good. It made me excited for the rest of the season. I know, I'm disappointed in myself for thinking this way as well. Who am I???