Five, five, five, five, five . . .

Five, five, five, five, five . . .

1 - Five places that I go to over and over: Mesa Public Library, MCC, Scrapbooks Etc., Cafe Rio, the plasma center?
2 - Five people who e-mail me (regularly) : Sarah, Emily, University 7th ward, facebook, Travelzoo top 20
3 - Five favorite places to eat: Cafe Rio, Paradise Bakery, Cold Stone Creamery, Macaroni Grill, Outback
4 - Five places I would rather be right now: in Hawaii sleeping on Emily's blowup mattress, in Hawaii, in SLC sleeping in the Sykes's basement, in my bed watching tivo, and on a fabulous vacation, Forks, Washington.
5 - Five TV shows I watch all the time: well there is WAY more than five. Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill, Hills, SVU, Office, Scrubs, ANTM, Real World, Samantha Who, Bones, Dirty Jobs.

Here's what you are supposed to do…and please don't spoil the fun…tag 5 people to post this on their blog...
Emily Kikuchi, Tina, Amanda, Angie D, Erica G.

If Julia was from the 'hood... sick.

p.s. If anyone watched Gossip Girl on Monday, we need to discuss it's AMAZINGNESS. Seriously some of the best tv I've seen since Denny died on Grey's Anatomy.

I feel bulky..

So Julia still has not found her camera, so we were reduced to using cell phone pictures. Our dad has acquired several new hobbies these days, and we thought we would share. Hobby #1? Finding a wife asap. Seriously, if that man could come and talk to the boys in my singles ward, I would be going on dates every minute. He=dating machine. Hobby #2? Buying things in bulk. I give you the evidence..
I am sure you are thinking "What the heck are they going to do with all that milk?" Well, if the world ends, all of our street just needs to bring a spoon:

No worries, there are two rows in here that you can't see. And there is a bunch on the floor that I couldn't tetris into the pantry.

What was that? You didn't think you could buy a GALLON of olive oil? Well I bet you didn't think you could get these either:
(Sorry I couldn't get this one to stay right side up).



Reidster, when will we EVER need a huge can of tuna?

Only Jones people would get why you needed a 50 lb. bag of popcorn.

And how do you get the ranch out of the very bottom? With a straw? Stick your hand in and it gets all greasy ranchy??

Something Reidster did not buy though that we have bulk of? Kittens. 2 of them R.I.P'd thanks to stupid Genevieve, but we still have 8 left! Any takers??? We=the Costco of cats.

These are Jane's 5 babies: Hannah Montana, Hitler, Miley Cyrus, Whiny, and Delia.

The three Tarzan has left: Garbage, Sprinkles, and Rocky. RIP to Snowball and Skinny.

Dear MCC -

Why must you turn the air conditioning down to near freezing in the library? You know that 3/4 of the students are hopped up on Monsters/some form of caffeine which usually just makes you colder. This is inappropriate. This is a ploy for people to fail their finals and have to give you more money to retake the classes. Naughty naughty.

Love, Emily

p.s. Once I memorize the microbiology book and regurgitate it onto a scantron, blog updating will happen. And when Julia finds her/our lost camera.

Dear world:

If you have lots of things to do, like study for finals, clean the house, breathe, eat food, work, exist, etc, do not start reading this book. It will take over your life and you will have obsession. However, world, if you have not read the prior 6 books, this book will make minimal sense. It has evil possessing powers only compared to Twilight.

Thank you,
A concerned reader

And on the 5th day...

So, a lot of the time lately, I have been feeling like this. In order to make us feel better after family members go to heaven, we buy pets. Which sounds like a good idea at the time, but not so much right now. We currently have two dogs (Pal and Genevieve), four cats (Katarina, Mouse, Tarzan, and Jane), 5 kittens (Garbage, Sprinkles, Hannah Montana, Miley Cyrus, and Snowball), Jane who is also about to explode with kittens, 5 chickens (Seurat, Ginger, Cinnamon, Brownie, and m.i.a. Armpit), a pond full of fish, and 5,000,000,000 scorpions that love to be harrassers. Incidents with pets that have only happened THIS WEEK:

1. Tarzan moved her babies and herself into the back of my closet behind the skirts. Out of all the house, she chose there.

2. Where did Tarzan have said children? Think of the most awkward place you will ever have to clean up kitten juice???? Annie's bed while Annie was having her Sunday nap. Annie woke up and started yelling for Julia and they started freaking out.

3. Whenever I get ticked at Genevieve the dog, she passive aggressively gets back at me. Seriously, if any person who is lacking a seeing-eye dog or a dog servant, please contact us and you can have her. I got mad at her for chasing the chickens, (which Genevieve also learned how to open the chicken cage this week and lets them out every time I put them away) she pulled my hose out of whichever pot I was watering at the moment. ALWAYS. Or she will pull it out of a planter, little Satan dog.

4. I was once again instructing Genevieve not to chase the chickens and Tarzan started carrying her babies out the open door into the backyard.

Seriously, you wonder who is the boss around here. I, the zoo keeper, am definitely losing.

p.s. We will post pictures of the adorable kittens as soon as our dad gives us back the camera cord and little black box thingy. He took it on vacation with him conference weekend.

The Jones Menagerie

Missing: a tan-ish chicken.
May answer to the name "Armpit"
Our stupid actually really smart dog opened up the cage and let all the chickens out and chased them around. Armpit is missing and really likes to fly around. She/he is a new chicken, we got her from a customer at SBE. If any of you Lyn Rae Square-ers see her, let us know. She/he is really soft and likes you to pet her/him. p.s. You know you wish you could think up amazing names like Armpit. The choices were Chloe (we know a child named that), Fiona 2, and Armpit. Armpit is clearly more classy.

Hi, my name is Emily and my blog has been hacked

Memo to Myself:

All things DO NOT smell like carrots.

Recent conversations with my sisters....


Emily: What perfume are you wearing?
Laura: Its that Davidoff stuff called Echo.
Emily: Its really strong how much do you put on?
Laura: On you know more then two squirts which to you equates to me smelling like the whole bottle with your freakish hypersensitive nose.
Emily: Well my freakish hypersensitive nose says that you smell like carrots.



Emily: Wo bubs, you're smelling pretty strong.
Julia: It's just bath and body works spritzer
Emily: Well you smell like a giant walking carrot



Laura: Why are geraniums so pretty but smell so gross?
Emily: IDK to keep the bees away?
Laura: Ya maybe, they make me sneeze. They smell like pepper
Emily: I think they smell like carrots
Laura: Of course you do.



Emily: I got new deodorant
Laura: Ya? is it better then the dove kind you said didn't work anymore?
Emily: Ya it works pretty good but it kinda smells like carrots
Laura: Excuse me while I strangle you through the phone for thinking everything smells like carrots, crazy.




Emily's brain thinking: Here I am walking, walking, walking to class.
Emily's brain thinking:Oh ya we are doing strep cultures in microbiology today
Emily's brain thinking: Here I am walking, walking walking into class.
Emily's brain thinking: It smells nasty in here like gross bad breath when people have nasty colds
Emily's brain thinking: Eww and it kinda smells like carrots



Insights of Emily's life that she may or may not be willing to share with the blogging world herself--brought to you by Laura Jones Fletcher

The 00's

So my brother-in-law, Lee, and I have been having a contest as to who can keep their crappy POS phone the longest. We both have the same model and while they do work, they are little strugglers. Example: no camera phone, no speaker phone, no anything. Basically a rock with numbers carved in. So Lee got a new phone from his work (a Dash) and he took pity on me that I still had the caveman phone. So that little phone pimp bought me a new one! I told him I wouldn't make out with him, or put him in my phone as "favorite brother-in-law" but he still wanted to do it. So, my old phone..
These marks are where Genevieve the dog attacked my phone after I went into the house. She was ticked that I poured water on her because she wouldn't leave me alone. She=kind of smart.

And a picture of my new 2008 phone.

Very high tech. Now I can document for the world the amazing things I have seen. Like an MCC employee playing yo-yo instead of working in the library and two pinatas in a sexual situation at Wal-Mart. Amazing. But no worries, world. I haven't completely conformed to 2008 yet. My water bottle..
And my i-pod


And someone may have told me that my camera is from the 80's.


But little by little I will add to my little collection of technology..

Emily 1, Thorny Plants 0

So this week I was playing landscape maintenance worker in the backyard. In my swimming suit. And now I know why landscape maintenance people dress like this:


So they don't end up with injuries like this after battling with the 450 foot bouganvilla in the backyard. And I only cut one down, 2 to go..


p.s. Yes I put my sheets on. They were just in the wash. I'm not a sick-o.